Fairly Scary Monster - A Children's Tune Poem by Dr Ian Inkster

The fairly scary monster [with screechifying mandolin]
FAIRLY SCARY MONSTER by Ian Inkster

TO BE SUNG AS MP3 ATTACHED FILE

I'm a scary, scary monster and I slither when I crawl
I'm a scary, scary monster I could scarify you all


When you get up in the morning I could pull your tongue right out
So you could give your mum no warning, Cos you couldn't even shout.

I'm a scary, scary monster I sure could frighten you all
I'm a scary scary monster When I shout the mountains fall.
When yr walking on yr way to school and when you start to fuss
I'l screech and scream and maybe drool You'll jump under a bus.
I will make the strangest noises with my funny screeching voice
And you'll kick your mother in the shin you'll really have no choice!


She'll turn around and smack you till you've forgotten how to grin
and then I'll jump upon Her and pull her chin right through her skin.

I'm a scary, scary monster I sure could frighten you all
I'm a scary, scary monster but I'm only ONE FOOT TALL! ! ! !
I can roll up in a bundle and tumble and tumble I got hairy little features I'm the strangest living creature; I want to make you shiver and maybe tear out yr liver, if I was just a wee bit bigger than one foot tall,

Cos you might kick me like a little ball and bounce me up against a wall - Not very good at all at all, at all at all at all at all!

I'm a scary, scary monster and I might learn self-defence
I'm a scary, scary monster that makes a lot of sense
I'm a scary, scary monster When I screech a child's heart melts
I'm a fairly, scary monster But I'll go live somewhere else……

Oopsa daisy not very tall, oopsa daisy not tall at all, oopsa daisy don't hit me with yr doll, or I'll cry and cry and call and call …. My Mummy Too! ! ! !
My mummy will tell yr mummy so there my mummy's got big muscles hahahaha …


Dr Ian Inkster 2016