False Awakening Poem by Rodion Myshkin

Startled from sleep,
I find myself sitting in a train;
Disoriented, I stare at passing sights
Slowly, the reel of my past flashes by,
Yet nothing of note, sticks to mind.
How did I fare in life till now?

Can I pull the train's chain
And stop Time for a moment,
Just to get my bearings
Maybe I lost track of my pace & place.
Is this a reality I chose to wake up to?

Could I reverse, this train in Time,
And ride back and watch
My life through my window,
Knowing I failed each day & night
To keep promises even to myself.
Should I silently brood over lost chances?

And suddenly, the train jerks
I open my eyes- oh, was that a dream?
Again, the window lets in passing sights
I now look ahead with yearning-
Is this reality, mine to choose?


Still, a doubt remains,
Would I wake up....again?