Fear Of Memories Poem by Sara Jo Andrews

I lie here in bed, as sleep eludes me.
That sweet peace is ever so elusive.
The darkness closes in and fast on its heels are memories,
Memories for which I long to forget.
Just when I think I’ve loosened their crushing grasp,
They come back with a vengeance.
That vengeance that destroys my blissful peace in sleep.
That hot vengeance that has me fearing sleep.
For those memories haunt my dreams.
The memories cause fear to leave me helpless.
As I relive them each night, when I can no longer keep my walls up.
When will these waking nightmares end?
Will they end when he is dead and gone?
Or even in death will he haunt me as the other one does, until the end of my days?
For too long I’ve traveled this weary journey.
I know not how to conquer this fear.
I know not how to overcome these memories.
I am incapable of locking them deep inside.
They are always too close to the surface, waiting to break through.
I cry out for help but I believe there is none.
-Sara Jo Andrews 06/11/08