Feelings Of A Broken Soul Poem by EMMA Funnell

I wish I could stop feeling like this,
I'm putting my life through hell.
I'm destroying myself and hurting the one's I love,
On the past I must not dwell.
I have so much going through my mind,
But as much as I try to speak.
It's too hard to say what I truly feel,
It's clear that I must be a freak.
Everyone tells me that I'm not,
But I thought they would know by now.
That I just can't talk no matter how much it helps,
This will eventually end up in a row.
I will get some help even though there's no point,
As I don't really want to be alive.
They say it's only natural for me to feel like this now,
But I long to feel the Grim Reaper's scythe.
I want it so badly I can almost taste my own blood,
As I imagine it seeping through my skin.
I should never have been brought into this world,
I was nothing but a screwed up sin.
I was only a meal ticket out,
But I served my purpose a long time ago.
So why on Earth am I still here?
When I want to be in the ground very low.
Lower then even the worms care to go,
So no one could ever find me.
But I'm still too much of a coward to end this,
Dead I long to be.
I would never want to hurt them,
Therefore I will not take my life.
I will go on living in this horrific world,
And throw away the knife.