Final Notice To Love Poem by Gina Bina

being away from you has affected me..
you being a part of my life has an impact either way..

without you i cannot write, my flow is gone,
clutter and chaos rule,
my mind flies uncontrolled from one thought to the next,
hoping, dreaming, wanting, even goals, have become things of the past.

i put you on a pedestal so high, i myself could not reach, nor see you anymore.
i cannot hear your name and be ok.
i can feel the pressure build up on my heart, I feel the burning you cause with in me, my eyes release oceans with each blink
your gone and i am coping, learning to push past the pain in a new way each day,
each passing thought of you causes me to pause, those are my longest thoughts still, filled with you.

since i have been home for the holidays i see that i am incapable of being here without you.
I want to run away again. I dont want to try and start my life here again, i doesnt hurt so bad from a distance.
the memories i have here hold you in them, and the strength it takes to try and smile from my soul is too much.

so incase you cant tell,
Ill seal it with K.I.S.S

love has become a bad word,
to be told by anyone, other then family, they love me would cause them to get cut out of my life completly.
a person like myself loves love, watching it grow in others or in myself use to make me smile.
and now i am afraid of it, the very idea of love, the power and control it can have over a person.
the way it can cause you to lose or gain your wholeself, it is wreckless to love.
I now feel that to love another person outside of your family
a person needs to be certified insain.