Go Away Poem by Katerina Val

Go away
when I pray
so i lay
on the ground
go away

Go away
when I fall
when I need to fall
when they violently lay me
to the ground

When I intoxicate
go away
and when I am benumbed
go away
substances
some roughly standing alleviation
and cracked condemnation
substances
and wonderings
not enough volition
to condemn

not enough humanity
to forgive

substances and wonderings
leave them in my empty hands
and go away

When I am shattered
by the multiple needs of a syringe
to drain it's vindictiveness
to drain me
go away

And when you are scared
when you cannot stand my skin
go away
I hate it
when you cannot take your eyes off
and with them
to just go away
I hate it
your pretentious sickened care
scared
we are both scared
your disgusted love
and with it
the way
you can't but have to just go away

When you see
lines of time
on me
on my skin
when a scratch
is more than you can see
or you can bare to feel
go away
and let my scarifications to be
forgive their way
but humanity has faded

Let my scarifications to be
forgive their way
or their love, their hate
they are the only thing
that can stay.

Because humanity
is born to fade

But these lines love me
not my acts
but me
not my words
but me
not myself
but me
they love me
as soon as they are the only things
that bare to live in me.

They will grow in me
and they will meet my scars
someday
they will laugh at me
and they will touch my scars
just to shout
"Pain"

Pain
is the only thing
from which you never got away
so if you are fine with it
with me
stay
for you can be the only thing
that never got away.