How Many Poem by Maximus D. Redwood

How many times has this happened to me,
The darkness before I,
Blinding bright stars in my eyes?
First time.
It holds my neck, wrings it up with its hands and—
And I, seeing red like roses, only see it as it holding my own hand.
A comforting exchange.
The red petals fall all around me, burning, but all I do is huddle closer.
For the warmth.
The marks litter my neck and mouth and—
And they'll stay there for all eternity.
It's back again,
The darkness before I,
And the stars in my eyes shone brighter than before.
Second time.
It creeped, creeped, and creeped up behind me,
And destroyed me from the inside out behind closed doors.
I saw red coming from my chest and it burned and—
And it killed me, but I let it go on for it is all I've known.
Until I've had enough.
Coming for a round three,
The darkness before I
Convinced me that the stars were gone, but they've completely blinded me.
Third time.
I don't know if I'll ever recover, if it'll ever leave,
If the darkness before I would just leave me alone for a change!
Roses and blood, all in my neck, my mouth, my chest, now they're growing in my head!
It burns, it burns, but it's not comforting anymore!
It's all I've known, yes, I've only known this but I don't want to!
Let me go, let me go, let me go,
How many times will it continue to happen to me?
I've been burnt to a crisp, what more is to cover in these red roses and gore?