Tuesday, July 17, 2012
How They Live Comments
Rating: ★0.0
Theres a world aroud this corner,
And i wonder how they live.
There life is full of dirt and muck,
There world is like a sive.
...
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Ailish Canning
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12/28/2025 6:40:17 AM # 1.0.0
Aillish, first thing I noticed are the grammatical errors. One line one I would use There is instead of Theres. On lines 3 and 4 it should be their instead of there. The word sive is spelled sieve. I'm honestly not the type to critique as I hate it. I am used to being supportive and not critical. Please don't think me mean! The ending line I just don't find it fits in. I can't explain it anyother way than it just doesn't do anything for the poem. Off to read your others. -Robin xoxo