I Dont Know Who I Am - Poem by cynthia Routen
nothing i do is right. everything i do seems to start a fight. i try my hardest to make them happy but all i seem to do is piss them off. their my family, their all i've got. i know its me, theres something wrong with me and it scares me. i see myself so angry, so ugly. im terrified i'll hurt them. in my head i lash out not caring who or what i hurt as long as it all stops. im lost, confused, what am i supposed to do? im still a child, thats what they keep on telling me but i havent been a 'child' since before i can remember. im sick, i can feel it, but theres no kind of medicine to heal this ailment. im disturbed and insane. when i dream all there are is pain and screams. i can feel the rage growing inside of me, is this how i was born, how i was supposed to be? people call me morbid but thats not who i am. they say im a poet, a messenger of the gods, but thats not who i am. i know sometimes what i am but for the life of me i dont know who i am.
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