I Look Fake Poem by Bethany How

I Look Fake



I don't know where to begin,
I don't know where to end.
I don't know if I can be mended.
I may have been to broken to be healed.
I don't know if I can be held.
Maybe I don't exist,
And I know I shouldn't persist,
But I can't help but ponder,
If I am meant to wonder,
Alone in this world
Without saying a word.
Am I meant to be left?
Tossed and not meant to be kept,
Like a filthy toy,
Destined to be destroyed.
My father has already done this to me.
Is he what I'm mean to be?
Or should I see,
If I can just be me.
Maybe I need to be saved,
So I don't end up being caved.
A knight in shining armour,
Who doesn't whisper and murmur.
In the end no matter where I go,
It's me who has to
Save myself from what's out there.
I wonder if there is anyone out there,
Who cares enough
To walk the world
With me, curled in my embrace.
I'm tired of being chased
By my memories of the past.
I want it to be the last.
Take myself out of the fast
Lane and stop to smell the roses
And do something great like Moses.
I wonder if I can do it
And not get bit
By the poison of love.
To fly away like a dove
And not be shoved
And left to be ignored.
I don't know where to begin.
I don't know where to end.

COMMENTS OF THE POEM
Bethany How 23 July 2012

Thanks so much Robbie Bennett. You're right, there is a lot of pain in my childhood which seems to still be here with me. Life isn't what it seems, it will throw things at you like tradedies and challenges, losses and gains, but it's what you do after those things that count. Just to let you know, i'm reading everyone of your poems and your titles are awesome. Thanks for the comment! !

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Robin Bennett 22 July 2012

Wow this held a lot of sadness and a looking for happiness written into it. It almost reads like a bit of a tragedy to me. What appers to be the pain of a lost childhood now has you searching for happiness when it is so difficult to put the past behind you. So raw and painful. Thank you for letting us take a glimpse into your life.

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