Cody O'Hara

Rookie (June 30th,1994)

I Thought - Poem by Cody O'Hara

I thought you cared enough
Foolish of me, haha

I thought deep down you accepted me
That no matter what, there was love

That I wouldn't disgrace you
Just over something so small

Or that I wouldn't disappoint you
For being who I am, being myself

But no I was wrong, I guess
In the end everyone is the same

Wearing the same fake faces
Telling me lies just to cover the dirt

Really deep down you just
Want me to change

To be like all the rest
To hate who I am and alter it

To be a dim-witted robot
And have no more soul in me

To be your ideal vision of me
The one that can't exist

Can't exist because I am myself,
Not some golden angel from heaven;

I suppose you don't want me to write too
You hate that I show my feelings

You would rather I just pretended
To be happy, like a puppet

Telling me it is alright,
Telling me you loved me no matter what

Then when the lies disappear
And the truth is revealed

Then what, what is your next game
How will you toy with me now;

I come home, and although I may
Not always seem it

I look forward to open arms
And company of loved ones

A place where, once I believed
I would not be judged like this

Where I felt safe
To be myself, to live

But now that is broken,
I know behind the words are secrets

And with those the mirror shatters
Into a million pieces

And I am left here, wondering

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Poem Submitted: Saturday, May 12, 2012

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