Jennifer Larkin

In My Head - Poem by Jennifer Larkin

I'm flying high, so high today,
Let me laugh the clouds away,
Clearly, all my thoughts are sane,
Cartwheels, dancing in the rain.

Circles round and round I go,
Today I'm sick, I'll sink below,
My mind the stormy winds that blow,
My thoughts, like hail, my life in throws.

The rolling waves have trapped me in,
The sun will rise, the day begins,
If I surrender before it ends,
I'll wake tomorrow to make amends.

At times I wonder what it means,
To live or love this world it be,
to sew your seed, not rip the seams,
To live Awake, not between dreams.

Each hour, day, entire years,
I've lived my life through future fears,
Youth blinds the early death that nears.

Is there a code or secret key,
to find and set my spirit free,
Release these chains, captivity,
Embracing every part of me.

Pull the trigger, I'll react,
What power? I've surrendered that,
You're broken, put the pieces back,
Boundaries? Never thought of that.

Painful self discovery,
this isn't what I thought it'd be,
See I as I and not as we?
What shattered reflection now I see.

Cried out for you, you didn't come,
what mental state you coming from?
Must keep smiling, must be fun,
It's not polite to come undone.

What path to take, how long to wait?
How many more mistakes to make?
And in the end, will I be whole?
This battle surely takes it's toll.

Original, or cut and paste?
I'm not sure which will fit my taste.
I need to know, I cannot wait,
which turn to take, I can't be late.

How much to gain, so much to lose,
listen to my heart to choose? ? ! ? ! ! ?

If heads and hearts would get along,
If smart and careful was my song,
I'd feel at home, I would belong,
And you would make me feel so wrong.

Forwards, backwards, upside down,
I'm in my head and all around,
Does this make sense, of course it could...
But no one ever said it would....

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Poem Submitted: Friday, February 5, 2010

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