Irony Poem by Cheryl L. DaytecYañgot

On a dimly lit night, underneath that giant
yakal while mosquitoes hovered above us
you ended us with a tight embrace and sobs
and answers that left a trail of questions
The struggle of the stars to pierce through the
ebony November night raced against my vain
effort to probe the window of your soul and
decipher the message of your abandoned tears
Students passing by stared, perplexed, at us
But their curiosity was no match to my own:
Why? What secrets do you keep from me?

Here I am reading a landmark case on the
rights of people to access to information
But the words have no life in my thoughts
where our inchoate conversation futilely
strives to complete itself and make sense
Your face -contorted in pain and drenched
in helpless tears- graphically intrudes into my
thoughts and blots out all images and concerns
No semblance to the woman who strolled with me
on the university gardens where we sat and
gazed at the stars as we dreamt of eternity

I rerun the throbbing of your heart as it beat for me
Have I mistaken it for a promise of the future?
I braced myself for a proposal, not your unilateral
declaration we must separately pave new pathways
I appraise the ruins of a future that collapsed when
you shook its foundation before it was even laid
What an irony! Together, we survived that powerful
July earthquake that left thousands without life
Often while alone with you I always felt secure as
though cordoned by a crowd of friends and family
from a wretched world where evil lurks from all sides

Now, I am surrounded by friends and I am alone.

(For Inah)

23 February 1991