It's Flipping Cold, Innit? Poem by Denis Martindale

My word, it's getting very cold! Three duvets helped for sure!
I had to, as I'm getting old, and felt chilled to the core!
I've got two trousers on as well, and snow boots on my feet,
So I'll survive this Winter spell as I turn up the heat.

Two hundred pounds will pay the bill for heating costs I'll get,
The Govern-mint has helped this way! Now I won't face regret!
I fixed my tariff for two years to keep the charges down,
And that's how I've allayed some fears and every single frown.

I go online, then I compare to check both price and weight,
I know some prices look unfair, but I won't take the bait!
Though they tempt me with their adverts and glossy photographs,
I know when every price still hurts and how each seller laughs!

Electric prices won't reduce, so I keep on my coat,
And while fixed tariffs bring good news, I've got no cause to gloat.
While others pay more than I do, the Internet helped me,
So I check tariffs old and new, while I've the energy!

I know when prices look so huge, it's time to go elsewhere,
That's why, like Ebenezer Scrooge, I show them I don't care!
The Internet saves me so much, with discounts every day!
As long as I can stay in touch, store vouchers work okay.

No wonder, when I search, I smile, and save through websites now!
And since I'm doing this in style, all I can say is, WOW!


Denis Martindale.24th November 2025.