Alc Harris

Rookie (England)

Jane - Poem by Alc Harris

You know me well,
Though my name does change.
It seems my time,
Has been a game,
Of power struggles,
And out,
This is what my life’s about.

From the moment mother held me high,
Praised the lord,
He gave a sigh.
For he alone knew the story end,
Into this world a victim sent.

Weaned on violent
spat out words,
The kind no child,
should have heard.
Dodging ever smashing crocks,
Never encouraged,
Persistently mocked.

Any wonder love
Was a valuable thing,
When he asked me, to accept
His wedding ring.
I gave all I had,
Which wasn’t much,
Just a need to feel
That tender touch.

Night time falls
On this life we build.
Thanks to the lord,
We bear a child.
But feelings flare,
Like times of old,
Jealous anger,
Then does me scald.

Inch by inch,
I slip away.
Holding on to each new day,
Its just a dream I always say,
Always a promise to be made,
I will be faster,
Smarter too,
Been here before but not with you.

To deserve the love
That he gave,
Forever must I be his slave.
Ridicule, humiliation,
Its just and fair retaliation,
For not being the woman
That I should be.
He takes away the rest of me.

I wonder at these tears I weep,
Is this the way its meant to be.
Love and hate in unity.
I know no other,
I have no relief,
Its gods plan I do believe.
Its never right, its never fair,
But I always find my way back there.

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Poem Submitted: Tuesday, November 22, 2005

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