Letting You Go Poem by Sue Stone

My eyes meet yours and
I am astounded, by my own ignorance.
When was it.....
that your face became so small?
Or is it that......
your brown eyes became larger?

Willing you not to
turn, and catch me staring crazily at you
and as you turn.....
surely that yellowing is the light?
I stare at you.......
just as long as I dare.

Frantically drinking in
your beloved face, to brand it on my brain.
Determined effort.....
to make a memory.
Muted glances and whispered talking,
I hear words like......
tumours, metastases.

No! These words are worthless.
You are my darling.
No appendices please.

I try to envisage
this inky, tenacious, intrusiveness
as if I can......
by recognition
identify a method of destruction.
I implore a higher being....
sotto voce

Not now.
One,
five......
ten years time?
But please......
not now.

How will I stand?
How will I walk life's tightrope,
without......
my ever present safety net.
Who will catch me now?
Grief.....
makes me selfish.

I want to cradle you,
as I once cradled my newborn.
Yet I must content myself......
with holding your dear hands.....
as you held my heart.