Level Of Pain Poem by Maria Sudibyo

Just want to see other's suffering
Just look to read other's angst
So I will not admit
That this is closer than I think
More real to be happened
More raw than the open wound
The lonely bitterness
The horrible hollowness
Do you want to feel the pain but not be affected?
Do you wish to just die in desperation?
This level of pain
This violent dealing
How much that you can take?
How much that you can fake?
This level of pain
This excruciating burning

Are we still together?
Can you still say that we are okay?
Maybe we only drag a dead corpse
We only stretch an invisible thread of affection
That's no longer worth to be kept
What still exists there
The growing wariness
The aching awareness
Are you proud with your self afflicted scar?
Do you need a pity from someone else?
This level of pain
This common fear
Could you raise the notch?
Could you bare the couch?
This level of pain
This thundering vein