Mari Poem by Jonathan Westler

A cruel, unforgiving mistress
Hands strong, grip stronger,
Ensnares my mind and pulls
Me down, farther and farther.

The world I enter, one of
Darkness and fear, supplication
Unheard by any ears, visible
Or not, though largely audible.

Thrashing, flailing, fighting the
Dying light that my eyes are
Trying to draw in as I am
Swallowed up by this strange place.

Hypnos, Somnus, can no
One hear my cries?
Can no one save me from
This encroaching devastation?

Caer Ibormeith, can you not
Save me from this place?
Is this not the place
Where you reign supreme?

I see, it’s not you I fight.
Mari, you cause me such
Dismay like I’ve never felt
In my life before now.

You pull me down into
This deeply seductive world.
My fight stopped long ago
But still, you carry me down.

The depths unknown, unspeakable
Quiet, calming, soul-soothing.
Consciousness lost, perception too,
As a warmth, unbeknownst to me came.

A blanket wrapped tightly,
A snug embrace of a being unheard
Deceptively comforting, a false
Security washed over me.

Mari, what is it you
Want from someone like me?
What is it that I can
Give to you another can’t?

Is it my mind, my soul?
My cycle of life or death?
Is it my connection to the
World around me? What is it?

Surely my will is not what
You want from me. It’s weak,
Fragile, easily overwhelmed
By one stronger than I.

Undoubtedly it’s not my soul
For my soul has been soiled
Many ways that some could not
Imagine in their worst dreams.

Do you not control that cycle,
That cycle of birth, death, rebirth?
Why would you want that from me,
A mere mortal, a simple being?

One such as yourself could
Not possibly be disconnected
To the world that you have
Created and molded, either.

What do you want? What
Do you want? Please en-
Lighten me to what you
Are asking me for.

“All, ” echoed around me.
“All, ” repeated over and
Over again. Repeat, repeat
Repetition of “All”.

What does that mean?
What are you asking of me?
All of what? All that I said?
All that I didn’t say and more?

Then it finished and I
Was back in my body,
Alone and disconcerted
By the events that had transpired.


“All, ” was whispered in
My head, loud enough to hear
But soft enough to not be
Demanding of me. All?

Worship, research, find all
That I could. I had to
Find out what “All” was.
Thus began my life’s path.