Memorable Cries Of Mine Poem by Bashyam Narayanan

We cry
When we are in pain
Pain can be physiological
Pain can be psychological
As the intensity of
Physiological pain abates
It is likely
The cry associated with it
Dies down
At a rate similar to the
Rate of abatement of pain
As we mature
We develop the tact of
Bearing a pain
Practically not crying over it

Psychological hurt
Stays long
As an emotional scar
And has the power to
Make you cry
And shed tears
Even after a long pause

As kids and in the total care of parents
We would have cried
To attract attention
And get things done
In our favour and the way we want
As we start understanding the realities
Of a practical world
We stop crying
But grumble within

A tearful cry is
An emotional outburst
Of a pain or a stir within
Most often
Cries get dry
As we plan ourselves
To act
To heal the hurt or pain
With a high level of maturity
We hardly see ourselves crying

Two cries of mine
Will stay ever in my memory
One, when I was in the total care of my parents
This cry is special to me
As I had no reason to cry
My mom, serving us food,
In that late evening,
Was in a mood to sing
Definitely, she should have sung
So well bringing out excellently the modulations
Associated with that tune or raga
Probably I was listening to her so intently
That my emotions got stirred deeply
And I started crying
Tears rolling down
My mom was able to read my mind
Continued singing
Despite one listener’s sobbing
Would have probably thought
The song would soothe me
It did something in me
Was it a feeling of helplessness
Was it ecstasy of being to able enjoy a unique emotion
I was not sure what made my cry
It was a long cry
And lasted
Even after she finished the song

The second cry occurred
When I was in a foreign soil
The task before me and my wife
Was to take away our grandson
From his parents
And keep him with us
Till the time they return to our land
This was a long drawn process
As we prepared ourselves very carefully
To the new responsibility of
Rearing the just two year old
Matching his temperament and unique needs
The day of departure came
All, except the kid
Were in a frame of mind
That allowed us not to exchange the usual pleasantries
As the time to depart approaching
I suddenly realized
That I would not be in a position to
Stand the pain of the kid
Who is getting separated from his parents
The emotional outburst came out
As I saw myself crying
Tears swelling, running down, wetting the T-shirt
My wife, daughter and son-in-law made attempts
To console me
But nothing helped
It took sometime for me to get over the pain
And to be confident
Of accepting the pain

This does not mean
I had no occasions earlier or in between to cry
I would have cried as many times as
Others of my age would have
But these two occasions were special to me
As in the first one
I had no definite reason for crying
And in the second
I felt so helpless that I would not be able to help even a kid