Moving On Poem by La'Chelle Yount

By allowing myself to feel once again
My thoughts are mixed to a certain point
Going beyond what I have known in the past
Picking up and dusting off...beginning again
I find myself and path without purpose
Trying desperately to figure out what this means
My heart no longer leads; I have no use for it now
My mind though always thinking seems to be running in circles
A process that needs and end while still here
Moving past me, trying out a new perspective
I feel paralyzed by my haunting demons
A child again under my blanket trying to find comfort
Yet my demons seem to find me here as well
Wishing myself to be in a different time
I see myself for the first time in new eyes
Pathetic I have been and my efforts futile
Searching for an exit... escape is what I need
Troubled by my past and the effects it has on my future
Relying on self seems stupid but the only way
I am not the only one I will bring down if I fall
Knowing falling is the only option now
I fear my ground will be lost
Bringing the torment of my actions on those who are innocent
Wishing only to give them the life they deserve
Failing miserably so far... to become what they need
Trying hard to find what is left of the good in me
Wondering if I have any to find at all
My journey must be made out of this
For I fear I will only leave for them my haunting mistakes
And a life of confusion is not for them
Knowing I must do better, I turn to them for strength
My strength and bravery seems endless in their eyes
Wanting to not let them down again
Getting up and continuing is a must
Living myself the way they see me
Never to be fooled by my reckless heart
Feelings are trouble and with trouble heartache
And heartache.... what a waste of time.
Moving on...