My Mother Was My Teacher Poem by Roxanne Dubarry

My mother was my teacher who taught me how to read
But most important thing of all that she ever taught me
Was how to have faith and believe in Jesus Christ!
Train up your sons and train up your daughters in the
Way in which they should go and when they are old
They shall in no likewise or manner depart far it! Alleluia!

My mother was my teacher she tried to teach how to love
But instead the older that I grew that evil that was lurking
Deep inside of me! Only seemed to blossom only seemed
To grow much stronger day by day and year after year Instead
Of loving my fellow men and fellow women I only learned how
To hate the very least and the very greatest of them!

When I was younger I eventually wanted to become a much better
Person but there was one major problem that always stood in my
Way! I was my very own worse enemy and I could never escape My problems Because I carried myself with me every where that I Would decide to go! My bitter feelings of hatred, bitterness and Revenge would always plague me! Never once setting me free!

I had four nervous breakdowns in the 1990's: 1993,1994 and 1998! Each time I would beg and petition my Lord Jesus Christ
To set me free Pledging over and over again! The very rest of my Life I would worship and faithfully serve Him! In 1998 the rest of My Teeth were pulled and that should have completed my healing
But alas it was not so! But it was a step in the right direction!

Eventually my sister would say, ' whatever happened to the Roxanne who wanted revenge I liked the old Roxanne much Better! '

I would reply, ' I sure don't that Roxanne was a unhappy person! '

My brother told me, 'Roxanne, you want to trust people and only see the good in them. People aren't good they are evil and they can't be trusted! '

No I do not look at our world through rose colored glasses! Except
Sometimes in my poetry! Certainly there is a lot of evil in people!
Yes some people even financially thrive upon.' calling good evil And evil good! ' Calling whatever wrong to be right and whatever Lurks in the darkness to be light! Yet there are multitudes of People who spend their lives doing good. My friend Christ told me

I was one of those people! While we were moving from Oakes Avenue to Madison! I had my former friend Christ, who now lives With his family in Seattle! To help me sort through all my stuff! It Was my mothers idea. And all that time I was serving man but
Starting to also serve God by singing in the choir of Calvary Baptist Church! I had to fight my mental illness all of the way!

I worked in their office on Sundays and also after church in their Library! I did the very best that I could do under many trying Circumstances! When I first started attending there they knew
Just how filled with anger and bitterness that I was! While I was
Going there the anger never completely went away. Primarily I was Relying mainly upon myself to reform myself instead of my God!

Shortly before she about June 04,2007 she talked with me. Telling Me that she could not help me anymore but I would have to learn how to care for myself instead. I was not to worry I would be alright! Her deceased loved ones told her that they would be Waiting for her on the other side! And I know they will also be
Waiting for me when my time comes to go to the other side!

I told my mother and my middle brother that they would both die peacefully in their sleep! And when they woke up again, they would See Jesus! When I fall asleep for my very last time! I also will Wake up and see Jesus! Unless I am alive and remain when the Roll is called up yonder! And I will be there! I want to take as many
People as possible along with me! I hope to see all of you there!