My Thoughts 5 Poem by Asef Hussain

Every night before I sleep
I think of what I have become
from what I was before
to all the wrong things I have done
but was all this worth it to myself
as simply a learning process?
the question seems vague though,
it was done through my selfishness
ever wondered why sometimes
I may have a lot of negative views?
try to realise that I am only human
to me all this is nothing new
I just hide it all by humour
or by spending time with my friends
one day I will just breakdown,
my life might just approach an end
but I am smart enough though
not to think of killing myself
it's the worst thing to do
especially if you think it will help
cause it never won't
if you think for a short period of time
nothing else will change
you might as well learn to cry
as it helps with depression
I have learnt it through the years
why shed your own blood
when you can sacrifice your tears
I put down everything
that I think in my head
I call them my thoughts -
a follow-up to the life I led...