Once A Normal Life Poem by Caroline S. P. Keller

I fell slowly off the bridge
Thinking how did it come to this?
Will I really be that person?
That no one will ever miss

Will I regret this choice I made?
Well it’s too late to turn back now
Looking back on my life
I can only say wow

My life was a mess
I will not lie
I was so overwhelmed
That I wanted to die

So I got on my bike
And rode through the breeze
Thinking about the fear
That I needed to seize

I cannot get scared
I need to find the courage in me
For this is the fate that I have made
And it’s something that I could never flee

My parents, they might have asked me
What had caused me to take my own life?
And if I answered them
It might hurt them like getting stabbed by a sharp knife

It’s not that I hated you
You just made me mad
You left me in tears
And always made me feel bad

You kept secrets from me
And always shut me out
You would never tell me anything
That I wanted to know about

The feelings I had were far too great
You hurt me you know
So I hope you reap
What you sow

I asked for an explanation
But you gave me none
You’ve kept me in the dark
So now I am done

You can say sorry all you want
But I won’t listen
You can’t control me anymore
For this is my own decision

The way you spoke to each other
There was no way of hiding it
And when I finally figured it out
I just couldn’t take the hit

Knowing that I had to choose between you
I just couldn’t do
And the painful part
Is that you both knew

Splitting up is the worst thing you could do
And I can’t believe you’d break this family apart
Did you even once think about what I was feeling?
And what you were doing to my heart

What you did was selfish
And for that I may never forgive you
But then again you might not forgive me
For I did something selfish too

You took our family apart
And now I am throwing my life away
Over this bridge
No matter what you say

I just want to go back
To when it was all okay
When it was once a normal life
Where I didn’t cry everyday


I just want to make all the pain go away
For all of it just to end
My heart is just too weak
For me to even fend

The breeze is going by me faster
And I shut my eyes
Praying to God
And saying my goodbyes


© (10/30/11)