I’ve never been to a poetry reading before
Are there candles and joss-sticks to garnish the floor?
Or would these combustible hazards, in fact,
Contravene a new European Fire Safety Act?
...
I’m supposed to be a poet
But the words come so slow it
Just puts me to shame.
Should I give up this game
...
I'm happysad
laughcrying from our
goodbye-ing
and farewell kisses
...
When God made the pigeon
There was one extra bit
In his do-it-yourself
Build-a-pigeon kit
...
Once, I used to dream of being free.
Of having the time to be me.
To bury my head in brilliant books
To try cooking food by celebrity cooks
...
Like a paperback
With yellow pages
And a broken spine
Or a corkscrew
...
Jocasta
tried to eat her pasta
fasta
than her brother who was the masta.
...
empty
‘cos you’re so far away
full
when I hear your voice every day
...
You’d probably prefer if I threw in a pound
To reward your performance
...
The helmet for your motor bike
A big syringe with a scary spike
A bumper pack of sticky plasters
The revolting oil that comes from castors
...