Reason Poem by Malory Joyce

How is it when we already know it is coming that when it comes we still seem surprised or unaware this was ever meant to happen?

Everything has reason, everything has reason even without purpose, and everything happens for a reason. What is meant to happen we have no control in changing, and if we had that control I believe us people wouldn't be very wise in our decisions to make the world better for us all.

Some people love summer and some people love winter. We can not switch the seasons to our likings. If summer were forever we would in the end burn and become dry. If winter were forever we would in the end freeze and become ice. For the more emotional thought, we can not bring back the past and what had been passed away. The dead must remain asleep in their own dreams. I once prayed for my grandfather, my uncle, and my brother to again breathe the air from life. I learned to relinquish and move on while they are staying still in their own harmony, yet I remember, need, and miss them dearly. I cried until my eyes became numb, I cried until my pillow was damp, and I cried myself to sleep. I hardly cry because of the fact that when I cry I am only hurting myself. I am letting out what I do not want to feel. I lock myself in another world with no doors or windows, I am in a sound proof room for no one can hear my screaming, and once I loose my voice I become mute giving me the chance to never explain to others why.

No one can truly understand how one feels or is going through. Even if our troubles are common our feelings and how we deal are completely strangers to each other. No one is the same. There is a variety of flaws and each of us own one. Our flaws give us our identity. They represent us and who we come to be. The ones who give in and give up gain weakness. A strong person is one who goes through life changing events and remains to be content with their life and who they are. I have my own opinions on how I see myself, I critique myself, only I know myself better than anyone else. When we say someone knows us better than we know ourselves, that isn't exactly true. They don't know how you react to everything, they don't know your past, they don't know what runs through your mind, and they don't know your next step. In life you are walking on a road with the room to fit one person and one person only; you. Everyone else is walking beside you on dirt. When it comes to mud, sometimes they turn around and reverse to the opposite direction leaving you going forward on your own but the loyal ones will keep walking beside you.

Sometimes I feel lonely. Even though when I'm walking along my road and I see no one, they see me because they are still there. My depression was caused mostly by lost or broken trust. The trust issues I have now leave me blind but my heart feels the appearance of love. I may be hated but I know I am loved. Even if my heart is broken by many reasons, those reasons happened for a reason.

I no longer search for the purpose of my reason being.