She Startes To Fade Poem by Alexis Rolon

They say you are supposed to live life big.
But how are you suppose to if you can’t live you life
You live in a house that all you do is clean
You have no friends and no room to live your dreams
You live with happiness upside down.
You live with tears in your eyes
And fears that just won’t disappear
You ask all these what ifs.
But that’s it
The way I feel inside has a face that hides them out
I try to be happy
There’s nothing I can do right which leaves me in a fright
I try to do everything you ask me to do
But you say I don’t do I right
Leaves me with question inside my head
You tell me to speak up but when I do
You tell me to shut up instead
I just don’t understand
You ask me to do so much
And I try
But you are never satisfied
People tell me I am no longer the same
They all ask me what wrong
And tears role down my face
The light is running dim they all say
I feel as if there’s nothing left
Besides a that single breathe
And it is driving them insane
I tell them I am doing well
Couldn’t be better
We all know that’s a lie
I ask my self why
Why am I still here today?
I feel helpless
I changed to try to bring me and my brother and sisters closer
But we still stand on the same line and I am still nothing
I look at all four of them
And I think to myself
Fours a perfect number with out a dought
I look at them and don’t see me
It kills me inside to know that I live each day alive
I hate to say it but I believe I am better of dead
But then I hope this is all just inside my head
I wake up till a puddle on my pillow
So I start my day off as I get dress
I feel so tired every morning I open my eyes
All I want to do is get back in bed and close my eyes
I don’t want to be seen by them anymore
I feel as if I have faded away
And there’s nothing more.