Sold Soul # Poem by Kwenadi Gaaje

I REMEMBER NOT MUCH OF MY CHILDHOOD
BUT I DO RECKON THE DAY I FELT LIKE I'VE LOST IT ALL AND HAD ONLY MY SOUL TO SELL.
BUT HOW CAN SELL HER SOUL WHEN IT'S THE ONLY THING THAT IS LEFT TO KEEP HER ALIVE?

AT TIMES YOU LEAVE EVERYTHING THAT SUSTAINS YOUR INNER PEACE IN TRYING TO MEND SOMEONE'S JOY.
UNKNOWINGLY YOU GROW TO TRANSLATE YOUR SOUL TO THE DEAD.
YOU TRY TO VOICE YOUR EMOTIONS BUT YOU'RE UNHEARD FOR YOU HAVE GIVEN UP YOUR SOUL TO THOSE WHO DOESN'T KNOW THE VALUE OF WHAT YOU DO TO THEM.

I REMEMBER AS A CHILD
WHEN YOU SMIRK, VOICE YOUR GRIEVE AND CALL OUT FOR HELP
IS REGARDED AS BEING DISRESPECTFUL.
NOT KNOWING THE MALADY YOUGOING THROUGH ADS A CHILD.
ITS AS IF A CHILD ISN'T ALLOWED TO VOICE HERSELF WHEN SHE'S CARRYING SA BURDEN
YOU GROW WITH A VOID
YOU GROW TO BE A BOOK WITH ARECKLESS COVER
YOU GROW TO HIDE YOUR SCARS
YOU ARE SCARED OF BEING JUDGED.
IT SLOWLY BECOMES A HABIT TO LAUGH IN PUBLIC AND DROWN DEEP IN CONVULSION BEHIND CLOSED DOORS.


YOU GROW TO BE A MAIDEN FILLED WITH SCARS OF HER CHILDHOOD.
YOU HAD COME TO ACCEPT YOU DESERVE NOTHING BUT TORTURE.
IT'S THE ONLY THING YOU'RE FAMILIAR WITH AFTER ALL
NOW YOU AT THE EDGE OF FIGHTING FOR PEACE AND LOVE
BUT YOU ARE SHATTERED INSIDEAND YOU DO NOT KNOW HOW TO REGAIN THE SOUL YOU SOLD AS A CHILD

IT'S NOW THAT YOU LONG FOR LOVE SO DESPERATE THAT WHEN SOMEONE MAKES YOU SMILE YOU THINK "ITS LOVE "
YOU YEARNING FOR PEACE SO DEEPLY THAT YOU RESTING YOU THINK YOU ARE AT PEACE WITH EVERYTHING
UNKNOWINGLY YOU ARE HURTING AND YOU NEED MORE THAN THAT TO FINALLY SAY YOU ARE AT THE BREAKTHROUGH WITH YOUR DIRE BREATHING MOMENTS