poet Mark R Slaughter

Mark R Slaughter

The Dream Of Angelina

Angelina Jolie pulled me down and kissed me slowly
As she ran her hands all over lucky me.
She whispered in my ear: ‘I want you naked, do you hear? ’
And then mutated as she spouted: ‘'ere’s yer tea! ’

Oh no, it was a dream, so very lucid and serene!
And me missus goes and wakes me just for this:
A bleedin’ cup of tea – yes I know, ungrateful me –
I should be thankful for my years of wedded bliss.

But this was Angelina, not a bowl of semolina –
We were getting hot and steamy on the sofa.
Her lips were all a’ pouting, ‘Angie, Angie! ’ I was shouting
And my hand was moving in to flippin’ grope her!

Now every night and every day, I would beg and cry and pray,
‘Angelina please come back – look just don’t quit.’
So did she? Don’t be daft! And my wife? Well she just laughed!
‘Cos every night she dreams she's bonking Bradley Pitt!

Poem Submitted: Wednesday, March 4, 2009
Poem Edited: Sunday, October 6, 2013

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  • Ivy KiarieIvy Kiarie (10/18/2012 3:42:00 PM)

    haha...nice humour. funny and entertaining. you do both quite well

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  • Veeraiyah Subbulakshmi (4/28/2012 12:44:00 AM)

    Though this poem seems to be funny, it may talk about the reality of how human race has changed, particularly women. The wife (men are the same for million years) agreed that she had thought about another man, while she was living with her wedded husband.

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  • Vipins PuthooranVipins Puthooran (10/29/2011 12:25:00 AM)

    It's a funny poem, , flow is nice and I like the climax, , ,

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  • Vladimir Cloud Reyes (7/11/2011 12:23:00 AM)

    ^_^ funny.... keep it up....

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  • Reshma Ramesh (5/6/2009 9:12:00 AM)

    lolzzzzzzzzzz my my my what an amusing write.........and i loved the frankness in the write.....if only angelina did read this.....well done

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  • Lynda Robson (3/30/2009 9:42:00 AM)

    Very, very, funny! ! We all fantasise about our dream woman/man, but these dreams never get to completion if you know what I mean he he
    10
    Lynda xx

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  • Pablo Cruise (3/20/2009 8:59:00 AM)

    Hilarious, Mark. I've had the same dream, but with Selma H.

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  • Vaibhav Pandey (3/18/2009 10:30:00 AM)

    what a great humourous poem..I enjoyed this one immensely....goes to my favs....10

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  • Anjali Sinha (3/16/2009 2:05:00 PM)

    wowwwwwww
    so much humour
    and now shes bonking
    Brad Pitt--great
    -10 anjali
    (hey Im namesake more or less)

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  • Jim Norausky (3/14/2009 5:23:00 PM)

    Mark, You are really good with the humorous poems. Loved it. Fantasy is one of the great pleasures of life as long as it does not interfere with reality. Jim

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  • Anita Wisniewska (3/14/2009 3:56:00 AM)

    A good comedy poem! well done, you have a talent for this.

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  • Dr Hitesh Sheth (3/13/2009 5:47:00 AM)

    This is a funny poem which made me laugh.........though it is funny poem if is full of one of the biting reality of the life...Good....Write
    I gave you full marks oh! Mark

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  • Duh Huh (3/9/2009 12:17:00 PM)

    I loved the jolly banter on this poem. Its lifes real comedic tone. I saw it as i read it and thoroughly enjoyed it. :)

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  • Stephen Stirk (3/4/2009 10:31:00 AM)

    Man that is absolutely inspired and hilarious. I love your work Mark. There's not enough of us comedians on here. This is wonderful, and of course with it being topical, it's always popular. I've got a bit of a soft spot for her and it isn't my......oops.
    Great poem
    Steve

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