The Gaurdian Of Tears Poem by dino evans

THE GAURDIAN OF TEARS

Lately, late at night, I've found it hard for me to sleep,
Awake inside my mind, there are memories I keep,
I hear the distant sounds of those who cry, who weep,
And those who have no one to call their own...
It's caused me to reflect upon this life that I now lead,
To close the weathered covers of the books I used to read,
I've realized now that I am not the only one in need,
Although I travel through this world alone...

I peer out of my window, and I wonder what is right,
The stars that shine above me, offer not their soothing bright,
I see only the cold of space, I hear them in the night,
How has this existence come to be? ...
Hours pass that seem to me as years upon the wind,
No morning light to ease my soul, and cause sorrow to end,
To bask in dawn's warm sunshine, open my eyes again,
And bring the life I've dreamed of, back to me...

But nowhere, do I feel within my mind that it will come,
I only long for peace of heart, though I have hope for none,
The cries of all the lost, I pray their crying done,
This sound, it drives me close to nights insane...
Have I already fallen to my last, and worst mistake? ,
Failing to believe it all, and all that is at stake,
I hold my aching head, to quiet sound the lost ones make,
What of me I wonder, when it's over, will remain? ...

At times I close the window, and I try to hide from this,
And grasping for the ring of life, I reach again, I miss,
Silence, Ah! sweet silence, my one and only wish,
But on and on, the nightmare haunts me now...
Where has love been buried? , It's silent headstone lie? ,
Why has sorrow's cruel insistence, been given to I? ,
How can I accept this loss, and listen as they cry? ,
I have to find a way to peace somehow...

If tomorrow just would show her face, I may survive intact,
Destroy this endless yearning, how would my heart react? ,
But tomorrow never comes for me, and chained here by this fact,
I only want to throw it all away...
And dash myself from windows edge, to fall upon the stones,
The waves to crash up over me, and wash away my bones,
Would anyone hear my cries, for years, as I have done? ,
For I can't bear to listen to them say...

That life has not been worth it, this heartless loss of love,
Can I refuse to stand here, to be made the victim of,
No hope of early morning dawn, just storm clouds from above? ,
Why have I, been chosen as the one? ...
To suffer through the endless night, no peace inside my head,
And hear the awful silence, of the crying of the dead,
I fear my written words of prayer to God, have gone unread,
And so, I stand at windows edge, alone...

To over and again, be the only one who hears,
I've given in to hopelessness, I've lost my fight with fear,
Afraid though as I am, they are closer, coming near,
The sound is louder than it was before...
Silent sound, inside my mind, I am the Chosen one,
The Guardian of Tears, who hears the heartbroken, alone,
I cannot see them, but I've realized where they have gone,
They beg to me, and claw upon my door...

But if I open up the door, and let them come inside,
Insanity may come to me, and here it would reside,
And every tear that's fallen will be mine, no where to hide,
And all this cruel world's sorrow, I will own...
And so I stand against them, I steel myself from hate,
Even through the years now passed, perhaps it is my fate,
I've tried to close my eyes, though I know it's much too late,
As the Guardian Of tears, I'm on my own...

I stand alone......

dean evans 7-7-2010