This (13th February 2006) Poem by Sarah Capella Smith

I am embarrassed to be a human,
To be part of this -
This that we call upon
In our hour of need.

It is not enough to breathe,
To have a heartbeat -
This poisonous butterfly that
Creases and folds, creases and folds.

The vapour in life’s breath is cold
And the oxygen too smart -
I see a tree - all it has to do is grow!
The winter, the winter is thinning me out.

Shut it out, shut it out, shut it all out!
I don’t want a premature depart -
There has to be more than this;
There must be something in the patchwork.

An analytical mind and depression lurks,
My eyes are heavy and separated -
I am tired and I am sick of this but still
I’m staying, I’m staying, goddamit, I’m staying.