Nero CaroZiv

To Be Alone - Poem by Nero CaroZiv

When I weep or when I mourn it does not mean
That I have a misfortune of any kind or that my heart is torn
Something undecidedly, unfitting in my mind to plague and to groan
When I sob or when I fret I have not encountered anything bad or mean

Yet to be alone is not in the land of fun
From my shadow I cannot hide, from myself I cannot run
It does not let, it does not fade
This awful, painful, empty, sinking, suffocating, solitary shade

O Sweet Solitude! if I must with you dwell,
Please comfort me among the jumbled heap
Of murky buildings; and stairs to climb on the molding steep
With toiled and jaded throng, people stretched to utmost swell

Long awaited darkness in my heart sinks and falls
Casting shadows, scudding past images on my walls
In this twilight hour in my little room I am alone
And the macabre memories into my vision are drown

Sitting near the sighing goring fireplace
Jumping, dying embers rushing towards my face
With cracking din, this is a serene and peaceful solitude
The whole world seemed detached, introvert and subdued

Everything comes back to haunt me again
your clear picture is so sharp, real and plain
In these shadows of my chamber gloom
You like an angle pass, a silhouette roaming in my room

Half awake and in and out of delirious dreams
Conjuring long forgotten scenes
So strange how the present mingles with the past
Awaken passions and unfulfilled lust

And as they entertained and entwined
They play havoc and sweetly torture my mind
As the embers of sighing furnace burst and fly
So does love converges to terminate and to die

To close my eyes I so much try
Yet your twilight image goes by
All persisting, all in agonishing loom
Like an angle passing through my little room

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Poem Submitted: Tuesday, December 20, 2011

Poem Edited: Tuesday, January 3, 2012

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