Too Sad To Be Remembered Poem by Nur Meiyati

Two weeks before your departure time
Our misery days
I learnt that the tree of our love
Producing fruit
The proof that we had shared our joy being together in bed

We were in the restaurant
Where we usually met
Every time you collected me
Before we went somewhere or just stayed in our paradise home

You looked to lose your mind
When I informed you about my pregnancy
And told you that it would be difficult for me
To raise our baby alone
In my such society and my situation
It hurt much to have to tell you that
Because it was a begging
“I will be responsible for what I did to you” you said
What you said hurt me
Seemed to me ….I was nowhere in your heart and mind
You really did not love me

No, no....you are a Javanese woman
You have to be able to control yourself
I told myself
Don't pity yourself
I stirred and stirred and stirred my carrot juice
Although the sugar had been dissolved
Just to hide my feeling
I smiled
To melt the awkward moment

I am sorry I cannot go to your house today
At last I could talk
You stared
As I never did that before
You stayed motionless
I took my handbag
And soon I had been in a taxi
With so many thoughts and feelings
That I could not describe how they were like
Too sad to be remembered