Trapped Inside My Own Mind! ! ! Poem by Rachel Hubbard

I want so deeply to just speak my mind or speak my heart I should say.
It feels as though every time I try I choke or am scared but holding it in brings more pain each day.
The words are so clear in my mind
but when ever I try to speak them it's as if I become blind.
Speechless I know I'd feel so much better if I just got the words out.
But instead I sit here everyday feeling trapped filled with doubt.
I feel so lost, empty and, incomplete.
All I can think about is how I feel in his arms, looking into his eyes, kissing his lips, how he makes me smile when I am sad, laugh when I want to cry, calm when I am angry, found when I feel lost and, complete when I feel incomplete.
And I want so badly just to tell him exactly how I feel
But when I try I'm at a loss for words my lips become completely sealed!
It kills me inside too keep my true feelings inside
I feel like a scared child trying to hide.
I can't find the strength to say the words and I don't quite understand why?
It's driving me crazy to the point I want to cry!
I'm not used to feeling so shy
Or not being able to say whats on my mind.
But for some reason when it comes to him no matter how hard I try
I just can't and I have no clue why?
Will I ever have the strength to tell him how I feel?
Or will I just let it go hoping and praying this emptiness will heal?
I can't just let this go and let these feelings be trapped in my mind forever.
I need to get these feelings out before I lose him It's now or never! ! !