Kristi Shingleton

Rookie (July 1980 / Kansas)

Understand - Poem by Kristi Shingleton

how long does it take
I guess forever
do I forgive
to save my own sanity
my mind teters
will I continue to wake everyday
wondering
how many memories will come through
who will remind me
do I get to choose
depression grows
and then fades away
will today be good or bad
I don't have a say
I drag myself up
I drag myself down
you can't imagine it
again, round and round
the day was good
the night brought surprise
I close my eyes
'It' was there
when all day
'It' hadn't crossed my mind
how did 'it' get there
when before 'it' was subconcious
memories appear when they choose
sometimes without notice
not again I cry
get out of my head
I make a joke and say I'm just fine
you have no idea
what's going on inside
if I tried to explain
you'd never understand
unless of course
you had been dealt the same hand
you'll never know all the events of that night
no matter if I've told you
a thousand times
you'll never know all the sounds
that came from my soul
or the silence that came
when evil was in control
I looked in 'Its' eyes
'Its' stare burned into my mind
this thing was unforgettable
until the end of time
the blood on the wall
and on my face
the identity I knew
completly erased
the look in 'Its' eyes
the power of 'Its' body
the evil in 'Its' voice
reminded me of somebody
confronted with something
not possibly human
the devil showed himself to me that night
fear was not an illusion
don't try to understand
don't act like you know
my memories are vivid
'Its' voice puts on a show
I'll continue to smile
and tell you jokes along the way
but sometimes my eyes will tell a different story
and my game you will unknowingly play


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Poem Submitted: Wednesday, May 9, 2007

Poem Edited: Thursday, February 24, 2011


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