Undiagnosed Poem by Melissa Joy Chesky

I deviated
from the plan.
The laws are there
to be followed
for normal life.
But I break them.
Just for
the fun of it.
I need to see
the reactions
of dangerous behavior.
I speed,
just to see
how long g-forces
can hold
my restless soul down.
I j-walk,
just to see
if the cars
headed towards me
will speed up.

Heh.

You don't even know
what goes through
my morbid-thinking mind
sometimes.

I think things
that shouldn't be
pondered,
I do painful things
redundantly,
I obsess
maliciously over the
insignificant;
my genes
deviated from
a normal human,
'the plan'.
And I sneak
among normalcy
undiagnosed
because -
who can deny
a sweet smile?