Unmedicated Poem by Maddy Man

Numb
Angry
Weeping
Not breathing
Rage I can't control
Icy grip on my heart that squeezes
Guilt guilt guilt
I don't know feeling anymore.
A bad mother
A mean mommy
I don't know myself.
A Lonely touch-me-not.
Why can't you fucking hear me?
Head ache
Eyes burning
Numb
Quiet
Feels like dying
Am I dead already?
Or do I wish I was
Why can't you fucking see me?
Idle hands that ache and writhe
Confused and numb
Drowning myself in icy water just to feel something
Relieve the pressure from my head
I'll drill a hole and wait for leaks
Always tired of too much sleep
Getting high because the lows are too much
Too deep
I'll surely drown or live under the water forever
Floating in the dark
Head under water filling my ears
Covering my eyes
Here id like to stay
The land of the living and sea of the dead
Floating somewhere in the half-way