Valentine Poem by jim hogg

She sat behind me to the right
I knew her name, I knew her height
She seemed to think that I was nice
The card she sent gave me a fright

In all the shire I was her peach
She made it rhyme with words like teach
I blushed and headed for the beach
Wherever seemed most out of reach

But Tommy helped me get it straight
He said "Her legs are perfect mate
It's time you took her on a date"
And, yes of course, her mum looked great

So anyway the date was set
By two half crowns I was in debt
My folks made sure my needs were met
And to the Regal on we pressed

And kept on pressing head to head
We must have looked completely dead
We never moved 'til someone said
"We're closed you two", then off we sped

We had to pull our heads apart
Before I left her at the farm
It left us marked but did no harm
And there it ended at the start

So scared was I of lips on lips
- I learned too late that it was bliss -
I couldn't bring myself to kiss
the peachy loving, smooth legged miss

Until the day that I turned twelve
I'd practise kissing on myself
Then into deeper things I'd delve
or find myself left on the shelf.


2007