Sandra Dodd

Rookie (April 17,1967 / Los Angeles, CA)

What An Ass! 20 Plus Years After Our Wedding Mass - Poem by Sandra Dodd

What an ass!
20 plus years
after the wedding mass.
You think you would not be
a complete imbecile.
Ready to stick your foot
in your assy mouth,
saying whatever flies
into your minuscule mind.

I felt ugly
I told you
to be cheered.
Expected was little loving
words to assuage my fears.
Instead you jeered
“Haven’t you been meaning
to call the health club, dear? ”.
What am impulsive flub.
Did you think after that
I would feel good?
You can go walk the
neighborhood with
a sign “I’m an ASS”.

What an idiot!
To place your thoughts above
My need to hear
you call me
Would that have been so hard?
Believe me, next time
I’ll just soak my worries
with your MasterCard!

What a complete stooge.
To think after such a comment
I would cook for you, Scrooge
Let me tell ya’
what a special ingredient
I would like to feed
you in your stew
You would have that ass
forever in the loo!

What a dumb miser
Of the heart.
To think after calling me
less than adequate to look at
that my covers
you would get under.
The couch is too good for you.
Sleep at your mothers,
maybe that will teach you.
I hope those blue balls
swallow you.

I would put you
in the dog house,
but for you
I would not put the dog
out of his house.
At least he adores me
enough to lick my tears,
whimpers sweet doggy
love words in my ears.

By the way
Mr. Smith was here.
He offered to console my fears
about being with such an ASS.
I turned him down with a grin,
but not until he said,
“Too bad you
are so beautiful!
A night without you is a sin.
Let me know if you
don’t let him back in'

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Poem Submitted: Friday, January 29, 2010

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