What Is This Feeling? Poem by Marlene Axsel

What is this feeling inside?
day by day the huge question fires up inside me.
The feelings I have,
no one will ever understand.

I don't know what I've done wrong.
Suddenly I'm a stranger to everyone around me.
I miss the smiles, the touch and the hugs.

A long time ago when I thought I lost everything,
I actually have more than I have right now.

Nights passing with wet pillows.
Every night the same scenario plays in my head.
I stop breathing for a few seconds and
feel the tears making their way down my cheek.

I can't help but caring too much,
and giving it my all to the people I love.
At the end, i'm the one who gets hurt...