Why Poem by Tessa Monaghan

right now
im on the verge
im on the edge
ready to explode
your making it easier and easier
yet harder and harder
all at the same time
its pulling in every direction.
my friends are saying do it
i have no choice
but your making my mind up for me.
but i still think
that we need to talk
but how are we suppose to talk
if you don't come to the one place
that we see each other
or
with any way to talk
your leaving me behind
your leaving me in the dust
so what do you think
im suppose to do?
are you doing this on purpose?
are you waiting for me
to make the move?
the first thing they say
when i tell them
things about you
'he's cheating again'
i don't want to get hurt again
but what you are doing
is slowly killing me
so why should i stick around?
why should i have to suffer?
why
should i stay
and why should i keep thinking
you are into me?
so talk.
...........
you finally talked
a week ago you said you were
you finally spoke
i saw it coming
but for some reason
it still hit me hard
what you don't know
is that all my friends
all said
break up with him
have you done it yet
you have to do it
my mind agreed with them
but my heart disagreed
so i never did it
my heart was longing you
i took talk from my friends
for you
even though
you didn't know
it feels like all the pain
all the agony
everything i went through
was all nothing
means nothing
everything was worthless
i am worthless.
when it happened
i tried to hide my pain
fight back the tears
it worked until
i got up to leave
for the last time
now i think
'i will never leave you'
now i feel foolish
for believing you
why did i believe you?
love that's why
but you don't love me
you have spoken.