Why I Took My Life Poem by James McLain James McLain

I loved the world too fiercely to grow old,
Each sunset struck me like a silver knife—
The hush of dusk, the stars so pale and cold,
Too beautiful, too distant from my life.

I longed for voices that would never call,
And touched the hands of ghosts in crowded rooms,
The tender songs that held me were too small,
And morning's promise faded into gloom.

They said, 'Endure, ' but never told me why—
Their dreams were stitched with threads I could not see,
While I, beneath the wide and aching sky,
Felt all the world withdrawing silently.

There was no wound, no storm, no searing flame,
Just quietness that settled in my chest—
A hush too deep for sorrow or shame,
A yearning not for pain, but rest.

And so I went, not bitter, but made free.