At the young age about 3 i was taken to foster care because of some wrong doings of someone to me. Unitil i was 5 i went home i have few memories of my past but im glad of it my sister tells me the her childhood was ruined because of it but i dont remember so it really doesnt effect me or so i thought. As i grew into my teens i came to know i had deep depression problems which caused me to become over weight, i started to slit my rists and lie obessesivly to any one about that and every thing else. it was uncontronlible or so i thought, in 8th grade i started to go to a new church i thought it was a lame idea i went any ways to please my mother i went for a while then stoped in 9th grade, Unaware a deamon came in to my life thru a new friend, and that s where it all began i started to smoke skip class and school and ewritting unapropriate things in walls of the stair well at my school and so i got expelled for my whole 9th grade year it was at least in november or late october. the leaves were just turning i remember the agoney, the embarisment, the fear i felt on that day but i lived thru it. then when the next school year came i was glad home alone nuthing to do watch tv and clean the house. i went back frightened like a young child lost in the department store. When i got to my home room the chatter the whispers i heard behind my back my face all red hands became cold and sweaty, the in a corner by myself is where i sat no one to tak to to one to make me feel at ease. the year started out good met upp wit my old friends told them what happened and went on with the school year i started to get in trouble out side of school stealing from stores lying to the ones i love (family) getting caught stealing i had to do comunity service to work off my debt then if that wasnt enough me and my friend which wil stay name less, he and i tried to steal a car got caught lied to the cops did i mention i was stating to skip school again after we skipped the cops took us back to the school were we got in to more trouble and suspended all of that because i stopped going to church after that i tried to b good tried to stop smoking which i concored and ever scince then i've been good handled peer pressor and live a holy life of god living in his words of grace i had i rough start in high school but in the end i divided and concored and i will never turn back to the life of crime!
I was once sad and lonely,
Having nobody to comfort me,
So I wore a mask that always smiled;
To hide my feelings behind a lie.
...
Alone I wait apon a step
Waiting, Pondering
Of what could be,
Of what should be,
...
Do you ever feel invisible?
You shout out and
No one seems to hear you
They make you have a lifeless feeling inside
...
In the shadows is where i stand.
not to be seen,
not to be heard,
only to keep my head downand keep walking,
...
I prefer winter and fall,
when you feel the bone structure in the landscape,
the loneliness of it,
the dead feeling of winter.
...