Putrid sight isn't it?
But yet oh how lovely it is to be hollow
Ribs sticking out coat hanging over moldings of what used to be a picture of innocence
Trail your fingers down my spine read the stories i've etched into bone with a knife
I am empty,can't you see? Im dying im walking im a frame of a person i'm not who i used to be so please somebody answer me when i ask where my own body has gone?
Just crumbs and scales is all it took
Mix in some free will with your lemon but pour it down the sink once your mother realizes how grass has turned into mud that settles at the bottom of your feet once time realizes its given you too much and fate decides its bored with you
Take on something new maybe diet try exercise you'll feel better- healthy even
Try drip iv's filled with last nights vomit today's breakfast
what force feeding sounds like mirrors what you hear screaming from down the hall
Not a person but a problem i've become a number on a band falling into bone from lack of circumference my wrists are bloody my brain is broken my heart has been stabbed three times by that pen you use to write notes on me
"Lunch: May 23- ranking: 3 out of 10"
"Rec: June 12 - sat in corner and shook for an hour- administered clozapine"
"Room: June 14 - Been sleeping for past two days- administered more clozapine and seroquel"
You shove these words down my throat and make them glide all the way down till they drop into my stomach and hit like bricks you are no doctor you are a tamer
Healing is not what is being done here
Healing does not look like children pinned down on metal floors shove needles in them calm them down make them workable for you take out my innards and put them on display you don't care about me you find pleasure in this don't you?
Watching me break myself you tell my parents you're supplying the best care possible
Turning around to lock me in that room again and call me crazy you laugh they all laugh but we are not a game for you to play till we get so used we break
I am done being subject to your trials and visions of purity and normality
I am a fucked up brain inside a walking corpse
Ribs sticking out just crumbs and scales is all it took
Practice lines on me read off the words under my shirt to your line of products like a textbook i told you to stop i told you i didn't want those pills i told you i wanted to leave that this place these people this is not helping you are not helping i need help but find fiends out for money instead
Let me help myself like you never did
Jump from ceilings too small for skeletons i can't move i'm stuck in quicksand, only you have a boat and i lead shoes
You with two hands you watch as i drown, throwing rose petals over top my frame
Don't you dare call yourself operator i am the one holding the phone up to my chopped off ear bloody stump i still have a hole it may not be as pretty as yours but at least i still bleed red