december underground

...

I open the padlock and give him the key
What lay inside be a mystery
My glassy feelings lay there on the wall
He betrayed my trust and smashed them all
...

I feel as though I’m dissipating
From the pain of suffocating
The thought of death is so inviting
Why don’t I put it in writing?
...

A friend likes to cut beneath the veins
How can she do this to herself, she said she can’t feel the pain
She started cutting more and not talking to me
She can’t possibly really want to die, I refuse to believe
...

A father is a man, which you can look up to
Who is supposed to be there, to give you love and care
But I am blaming it all on you
You were none of those things, to love and to care
...

Fantasies of perfection,
Dreams of redemption,
From a life of hate
Wishes of bliss,
...

Is it possible to believe in more than what is here?
For joy and love and passion in life, instead of rain and fear
To have someone smile when they look at you, instead of frowns of disgust
To have someone to hold, care for and most of all to trust
...

C is for the compliments that you don’t give me
R is for the respect that I never see
A is for the annoying things you do and say
I is for the ignorance that makes me cry
...

Help me, help me
Someone out there
Can anyone hear my cries?
Why don’t you care?
...

Time has flown by since the last time I’ve thought of you
I miss what we had; now you’re looking for someone new
I want to say I’m sorry, for what I put you through
I do still love you, although I was untrue
...

I do not want to hide
The feelings that are inside
But the pain that is behind
Has always made me cry
...

When I was told I was too sick to run
My dreams of being an Olympic athlete were done
I couldn’t believe what my doctor had just said
That night there were plenty of tears I shied
...

You didn’t care, you weren’t aware of how I really felt
You never even took the time
To notice we were broke
You lying cheating man,
...

The barking that lay,
Just outside
Has caused me to stay,
Frightened inside
...

My eyes are overfilling
I just want a new beginning
I want her in my life again
But that’s the problem
...

L is for the love that I gave to you
A is for the amazing things you do
U is for understanding my pain
R is for the respect that I gained
...

The damage you have caused,
Has left me broken hearted
Sometimes I wish I could have paused,
And enjoy the time we had before you parted
...

...

The night falls without a sound, soulless are we.
The emotion for which you sacrifice yourself
Flares once, then dies,
Devoured by the dark abyss,
...

Don’t waste your time on her
Spend all your time with me
Now that you’re under my spell
I’m not gonna let you free
...