2020 Poem by Cheska I.

I wrote for you, you must've noticed;
Made a way to be in your way, you must've noticed.
Saw to it that my presence will be obvious, you must've noticed;
Gave away green flags everyday, you must've noticed.

For two years I thought I was able to keep it,
The swirling feeling in my chest, but no.
You were too friendly and too tolerant that I thought
You had that swirling feeling too, but you didn't.

I knew it was wrong,
I knew it was supposed to stop,
I knew it was a big mistake,
But I never knew how to let go.

And that's when I felt pathetic
And that's when I felt like a fool
And that's when I felt the need to end everything
And that's when I decided to just,

Quit

And put a facade that I am not, in any circumstance,
Affected by you, your smile, your voice
And waited for a year to pass
And as this year is coming to its end, I want to say

With all that's left in my heart, I am sorry.
With all that's left in my sanity, I am sorry.
With all that's left in me, I am very sorry.