A Bit Of Fun Poem by Ray Mather

What fun! It was great!
You should have seen her face!
She didn’t half look a mess...
There was egg and flour all over the place.
Everyone was howling –
They didn’t think we’d dare –
But Darren held her down
While I ground the eggs in her hair.
All half-dozen I used
Till the yoke dribbled right down her neck.
Then we emptied the packet of flour –
Boy, did she look a wreck!
We could hardly stand up for laughing
As she staggered like a drunk down the street.
When it comes to having a giggle
Daz and I just can’t be beat!

All the way home I was burning.
People laughed, pointed and stared.
“A bit of fun” THEY called it –
I thought fun was something you shared.
I’ve never felt so embarrassed,
Didn’t know where to hide my head,
Tears were streaming down my face,
I wished that I was dead.
I thought that mum would be mad -
Her mouth dropped and her eyes opened wide –
But when she saw how upset I was,
She cried and cried and cried.
We washed my hair three times over
But couldn’t get rid of the slime;
It was too painful to brush or comb,
It wasn’t right for a long time.
My blouse was covered in grease
And as I got changed we found
There were cuts and bruises everywhere
From being held down on the ground.
The bruises, the cuts and the stains
Will eventually all go away.
But the shame and the anger remain;
I’ll NEVER forget that day.


2006