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Sunday, September 2, 2007

A Lie For A Love

Rating: 3.5
All of it is a lie
As I thought I loved you,
Until all you did was make me cry.

I voice to you a quiet 'why'
And all you did was walk right through;
I felt my heart echo your lie.

I tried to get myself by,
But my mind drifts to you two,
And I break down and cry.

And then I feel your hand on my thigh,
And I think of us too-
Followed by the mantra of the lie.

And there's that look in your eye,
Then I forget that you made my eyes dew;
But then I recall that you lived the lie
All just to make me cry.
Melissa Joy Chesky
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COMMENTS
Greenwolfe 1962 29 June 2008
The rhymes in here are rather simple and while I like repetition, it has to have some kind of musical flow to it. This poem is almost devoid of any rhythm. That really hurts it badly. I can't recommend it for that reason. GW62
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