As I Am Poem by Smoky Hoss

I can't quite recall the last time
I felt her contentment, only her desperation,
That grave need to be secure, but
Not truly at peace, at least not with me,
As I am.
I feel desperately needed, but,
Not deeply desired, for this is
As I am.
- The utter tenacity of a seeming moment,
The remorse of a reoccurrence,
The unpredictable improprieties of
Blending a soul with a body,
All form and overflow to singe, bind and burn,
The delicate human heart…
Who can ever win at the game of life?
No one plays the hand, dealt them entirely alone.
And none of us players ever completely understands the rules that we all played by.
Only the Dealer truly knows;
And he remains, like our desires, in the shadows,
Only partially, imperfectly, given to tender.
- I still can't recall the last time
I felt her unconditional touch,
The giving of herself completely,
Without need of any repayment,
The pure offer of genuine love, given to me,
As I am.