Bash Poem by Bash Mutumba

Tis not a nickname, no I'm not a brash!
Thou shouldst not think mine school-tests I did pass:
My brains were volatile in physics class,
For that I always got a caustic lash.
Well, sometimes I'd skip class to stake for cash
And then just influence a tender lass,
To come with me and romp in shrubs of grass,
And make my fingers give her parts a rush.
But this time I was tempted to explore,
What juveniles are told is felony:
My undergarments bash'd the turfy floor,
Betwixt I knelt as if 't was litany!
Ah! Teacher's horsewhip set my back ablaze,
My lust awaits post-matrimonial phase!