Birth Mother Poem by Mayra Duron

For years i looked in the mirror
Wondering
Who i look like
Where i got my features
My hair
My brown eyes
My lips
And yes, even these over sized hips
And i would immediately look away
And become enraged
At the simple fact
That i would crave to know you
Birth mother, i tried to hate you
I mean why should i care
Did you?
I would ask myself
How could a mother do this?
Give up her own baby girl
How dare you send me off
Into this cruel world by myself?
I would be lying
If i didnt admit that this was
The source of my rebellion
Running from my thoughts
Not feeling that i was good enough
I mean
Did my father even know that I existed?
Why did you give me away?
So many unanswered questions
But you know what birth mother?
I stand here today
And if i could say one thing to you
It would be thank you
I came to the realization
That would you did for me was so selfless
So couragous
So if i could say one thing
It would be i love you
And i want you to know that
If you ever fear that i would be angry
I was
But now that has turned into appreciation
If you ever fear i would be disappointed
I was
But you became my courage
If you ever feared that i wouldn't be loved
I was
The woman you gave me to
Held onto me so strong
She has been a pure reflection
Of unconditional acceptance
If you ever worried if i would be neglected
Who hasn't?
If you ever fear i would go hungry
I did
But now i have grown to appreciate every meal
If you ever feared that i would struggle
I did
But so do butterflies
But when they push forward they are so beautiful